Do you ever have a week that's just so incredibly bad that you don't believe it actually exists? That was my past two weeks.
As I mentioned before, my grandmother passed away about 2 weeks ago. The worst part was after finding out. Not only because we were all so devastated, but because of the conditions surrounding her passing. She died alone, in her home, potentially in her sleep. Her neighbour noticed newspapers piling up and they called the town administration, who then called the first responders who went to her house. The coroner said it was about 4 days between death and her being found.
It makes me really sad that she died that way. Don't get me wrong, it's sad that she died in general but to die alone with no one finding you for days... I hope her soul felt better once she was found though.
That was Wednesday that we learned about her passing, and Friday we were dealt another blow. Friends of mine that live in the same townhouse complex as us lost their 1 year old son. I don't know the specifics, only that he never woke up from his nap. When my friend told me I couldn't hold it together. I couldn't even imagine losing my daughter, let alone in a way so helpless. (in that the parent is helpless because there was no indication or reason).
After that, I needed to take the week off. I couldn't deal with the fact that two people so important to me were taken away from me. I still can't deal with it. But I'm working on getting through it.
Now back to our regularly scheduled blog postings.
I'm super proud of myself. I got properly fitted for some running shoes a couple weekends back, and they've helped so much. And I apparently can now jog intermittently on the treadmill without feeling like I'm going to die. I'm doing some interval training to help me get up there, and my goal by August is to be able to jog an entire mile. Now I'm doing about half. It may sound like peanuts to most people but I was in the WORST shape ever. I would get mildly winded walking up my stairs (okay, being honest I still feel a little winded even still). I'm still trying so hard to get into a habit but... It sucks being a single parent during the week. I don't have enough time to get everything done. The past 3 weeks I haven't even had a moment to go grocery hopping during the week. So my daughter and I have not been eating the best. I was supposed to be taking part in 'A Month Without..' with my co-workers and June was suppose to be fast food/takeout. Yeah. That didn't happen.
That all being said, I'm finding a new appreciation for the Epicure that I sell. When you're trying to lose weight, it's hard cooking without using super salty ingredients or tons of sauces. Thankfully the spices and dip mixes are low sodium and delicious, not to mention the cookware is super great. I use my steamers a couple times a week because I have this huge 'ew gross I don't want to' thing about touching raw meat. This way I can just shove it from the bag into the steamer and it's GREAT.
Wow, this totally went off the rails. I aim at a somewhat coherant post next time, maybe with a recipe or two.
Friday, June 27, 2014
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
The Day I'll Never Forget
I lost my Gramma today.
I never thought I'd say those words. I'm not trying to imply that I'm naive enough to think that my Gramma would stick around forever. I just mean that there's never any way to prepare for the absolute gut-wrenching loss that is losing a loved one.
My mom had me when she was 19. My biological father was never in the picture, and my mom and I lived with my Gramma for a bit in the beginning. Lots of the pictures of me when I was younger are at my Gramma's house, or even with my Gramma.
She was my biggest fan and my greatest champion. I could go to her about anything and she would have something to say about it (be it good or bad). She put up with zero crap, but also spoiled me rotten.
It was a known fact that I was the favourite.
Everyone always has regrets when someone dies. They wish that they had talked to the deceased more, that they visited them, etc etc. I just wish that my Gramma was able to be around to see the person that I will become, to see her great-grandchild/ren grow up, and to see the legacy that she created come to fruition.
My Gramma did a lot for me.
She apparently never knew how to sew until I came around, and then she was making me clothes (from awesome 60s and 70s patterns), and sewing my first couple kilts and highland dance costumes. She used to let me help her gather the fruits and vegetables from her garden, until she saw me just pop a squat besde the strawberry bushes and shove them all in my face instead of putting them in the bucket.
She always stood up for me when others were putting me down, and she never once made any sort of comment about my weight or figure or anything. She loved me just the way I am, and I love her for all the same.
I'm going to miss her so much I can't even fathom it right now.
In short, my Gramma is and was an amazng person, and I just wish that she could have stayed around longer.
I never thought I'd say those words. I'm not trying to imply that I'm naive enough to think that my Gramma would stick around forever. I just mean that there's never any way to prepare for the absolute gut-wrenching loss that is losing a loved one.
My mom had me when she was 19. My biological father was never in the picture, and my mom and I lived with my Gramma for a bit in the beginning. Lots of the pictures of me when I was younger are at my Gramma's house, or even with my Gramma.
She was my biggest fan and my greatest champion. I could go to her about anything and she would have something to say about it (be it good or bad). She put up with zero crap, but also spoiled me rotten.
It was a known fact that I was the favourite.
Everyone always has regrets when someone dies. They wish that they had talked to the deceased more, that they visited them, etc etc. I just wish that my Gramma was able to be around to see the person that I will become, to see her great-grandchild/ren grow up, and to see the legacy that she created come to fruition.
My Gramma did a lot for me.
She apparently never knew how to sew until I came around, and then she was making me clothes (from awesome 60s and 70s patterns), and sewing my first couple kilts and highland dance costumes. She used to let me help her gather the fruits and vegetables from her garden, until she saw me just pop a squat besde the strawberry bushes and shove them all in my face instead of putting them in the bucket.
She always stood up for me when others were putting me down, and she never once made any sort of comment about my weight or figure or anything. She loved me just the way I am, and I love her for all the same.
I'm going to miss her so much I can't even fathom it right now.
In short, my Gramma is and was an amazng person, and I just wish that she could have stayed around longer.
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
Chicken Club Wraps
I cannot stress enough how much I am in love with my Epicure steamers. Yes, I sell the stuff (here, to be precise) but that doesn't mean that I like all of it. Not a huge fan of the Pulled Pork What's For Dinner (not that anyone asked), for example.
Anyway, these steamers are fantastic. They come in two sizes, and you just pop your stuff in there no oil or water, and cook for whatever time it is that you're cooking. For example, I cooked two 5 or 6oz chicken breasts in the square steamer for 10 minutes and they were perfect. Juicy, and fully cooked. As someone who has had food poisoning more than I want to (anything over 1 time is more than enough), my chicken is usually dry and stringy. No more!
So anyway, back to these Chicken Club Wraps.
I cooked the chicken in the steamer, with a sprinkling of seasoning salt, ground thyme, and smoked paprika. I let that sit while I cooked my daughter's food because she was acting like the world would end if she didn't get to eat her chicken nugs. Kids, amirite?
I cooked some bacon up too, because what's a club sammich without the bacon? Although I definitely regretted it, because my body seems to abhor pork bacon. Turkey bacon is fine, pork bacon and I feel nauseated.
I digress.
I chopped up some tomatoes, grabbed some green leaf lettuce (a favourite of mine for sandwiches), and then started putting the wrap together as I steamed some potatoes in my rectangular steamer (1 baking potato cut into 1" cubes and nuked it for 6 minutes = perfect tatoes with zero oil). Lettuce down, then chicken (used about half a breast), then tomatoes and bacon, then topped with a very light drizzle of Epicure Honey Mustard.
Mmmm.
My Fitness Pal gave this meal (including the potatoes) a 592 cals, but I think that's because the wrap was a white flour one (180 calories) and that dang bacon was 200 calories. Next time I make it, it'll be turkey bacon on a whole wheat wrap and I think I could get it down to under 500. Regardless, I'm still full from supper and my mouth is still singing my own praises.
I also knew I should have used the smaller plate for my picture, but you just shut your face.
Anyway, these steamers are fantastic. They come in two sizes, and you just pop your stuff in there no oil or water, and cook for whatever time it is that you're cooking. For example, I cooked two 5 or 6oz chicken breasts in the square steamer for 10 minutes and they were perfect. Juicy, and fully cooked. As someone who has had food poisoning more than I want to (anything over 1 time is more than enough), my chicken is usually dry and stringy. No more!
So anyway, back to these Chicken Club Wraps.
I cooked the chicken in the steamer, with a sprinkling of seasoning salt, ground thyme, and smoked paprika. I let that sit while I cooked my daughter's food because she was acting like the world would end if she didn't get to eat her chicken nugs. Kids, amirite?
I cooked some bacon up too, because what's a club sammich without the bacon? Although I definitely regretted it, because my body seems to abhor pork bacon. Turkey bacon is fine, pork bacon and I feel nauseated.
I digress.
I chopped up some tomatoes, grabbed some green leaf lettuce (a favourite of mine for sandwiches), and then started putting the wrap together as I steamed some potatoes in my rectangular steamer (1 baking potato cut into 1" cubes and nuked it for 6 minutes = perfect tatoes with zero oil). Lettuce down, then chicken (used about half a breast), then tomatoes and bacon, then topped with a very light drizzle of Epicure Honey Mustard.
Mmmm.
My Fitness Pal gave this meal (including the potatoes) a 592 cals, but I think that's because the wrap was a white flour one (180 calories) and that dang bacon was 200 calories. Next time I make it, it'll be turkey bacon on a whole wheat wrap and I think I could get it down to under 500. Regardless, I'm still full from supper and my mouth is still singing my own praises.
I also knew I should have used the smaller plate for my picture, but you just shut your face.
Guacamole Turkey Burgers
You heard me right. Turkey burgers... with guacamole. I honestly don't know why I waited so long to
a) make my own turkey burgers; and
b) top them with guacamole.
The original recipe can be found here, courtesy of Modern Christian Homemaker. I used their recipe for the burgers themselves, adding spices and substituting. And then of course the guacamole.
Burger Patties
2 packages of Lilydale ground turkey breast
Cornflake crumbs (enough to make it stick)
2 tbsp minced garlic
Some BBQ sauce to hold it together
dash of Worcestershire
sprinkle of fresh thyme
juice from half a lemon
Salt, pepper, seasoning salt... The sky's the limit.
1. Mix your stuff. Form into patties, then let sit (in the fridge, for the love of Pete) for awhile. Like half an hour or so. I think this recipe made 8 burgers, but my dad makes the patties HUGE.
2. Heat your grill, then grill these burgers. Because that's what you do with burgers.
Guacamole
2 ripe avocados
2 limes
2 tbsp sour cream OR greek yogurt
2-3 cloves of garlic, minced fine
1 tsp cilantro
salt & pepper to taste
1. Smash your 'cados. Smash 'em real good.
2. Juice your limes into the 'cados. I just set a wire strainer on top of the smush, just to catch the strings and seeds. But, y'know, if you have a citrus juicer thingie that would work too.
3. Mix in your sour cream/greek yogurt, garlic, and cilantro. Then tasted it. Honestly, guacamole is always "to taste". If your guac needs the salt and pepper (mine does), I add a couple grinds of each at a time, then taste it again, and then keep repeating until I like it. Feel free to taste as you go with the limes and the sour cream too, because you might not like it as limey as I do.
To Serve!
Top your buns or flatbread or whatever with lettuce, tomato, cheese (we used Kraft Singles Fat Free Mozzarella and it was a great choice), and guacamole. Oh and a burger too. Duh. Be prepared to die and go straight to heaven. Keep in mind that guac makes your burger super messy, so maybe don't wear fancy clothes or the colour white. And keep a fistful of napkins nearby.
a) make my own turkey burgers; and
b) top them with guacamole.
The original recipe can be found here, courtesy of Modern Christian Homemaker. I used their recipe for the burgers themselves, adding spices and substituting. And then of course the guacamole.
Burger Patties
2 packages of Lilydale ground turkey breast
Cornflake crumbs (enough to make it stick)
2 tbsp minced garlic
Some BBQ sauce to hold it together
dash of Worcestershire
sprinkle of fresh thyme
juice from half a lemon
Salt, pepper, seasoning salt... The sky's the limit.
1. Mix your stuff. Form into patties, then let sit (in the fridge, for the love of Pete) for awhile. Like half an hour or so. I think this recipe made 8 burgers, but my dad makes the patties HUGE.
2. Heat your grill, then grill these burgers. Because that's what you do with burgers.
Guacamole
2 ripe avocados
2 limes
2 tbsp sour cream OR greek yogurt
2-3 cloves of garlic, minced fine
1 tsp cilantro
salt & pepper to taste
1. Smash your 'cados. Smash 'em real good.
2. Juice your limes into the 'cados. I just set a wire strainer on top of the smush, just to catch the strings and seeds. But, y'know, if you have a citrus juicer thingie that would work too.
3. Mix in your sour cream/greek yogurt, garlic, and cilantro. Then tasted it. Honestly, guacamole is always "to taste". If your guac needs the salt and pepper (mine does), I add a couple grinds of each at a time, then taste it again, and then keep repeating until I like it. Feel free to taste as you go with the limes and the sour cream too, because you might not like it as limey as I do.
To Serve!
Top your buns or flatbread or whatever with lettuce, tomato, cheese (we used Kraft Singles Fat Free Mozzarella and it was a great choice), and guacamole. Oh and a burger too. Duh. Be prepared to die and go straight to heaven. Keep in mind that guac makes your burger super messy, so maybe don't wear fancy clothes or the colour white. And keep a fistful of napkins nearby.
Penne & Spaghetti Squash Alfredo
Okay so... Food time.
I've been playing around with recipes for awhile, trying to make them "skinny" versions or whatever the hell the current word is for reducing the fat and not being such a pig. Yeah, skinny.
Pinterest is my best friend right now. Honestly, it is. How some of these bloggers come up with these recipes is beyond me, but I'm okay with it because my body likes the majority of it so I like the majority of it.
Below, I'm going to include some of the favourite recipes that I've used lately. Granted, there are still a lot of days where I just throw shit together and it's a "meh" meal. But these ones are great.
Spaghetti Squash Alfredo
The above is the original recipe, which I didn't entirely follow. I mean, yes, I had all of the components. I followed the instructions for the alfredo sauce. But I added sweet, amazing, delicious... carbs.
1 spaghetti squash, cooked as you so choose*, scraped and spaghetti'd
2 cups dry PC Blue Menu Whole Wheat Penne
I cooked my squash by slicing it in half, scraping out the seeds, placing it face down on a cookie sheet with some water at 375 for about 45 minutes.
Cook your pasta as you get the sauce started. The sauce takes way longer than cooking the pasta though.
Sauce
Note:Uh, so maybe don't totally double the sauce amounts. Because I had way too much. So maybe 1.5 times it? Regardless, I doubled the below recipe and it was just way too much
1 Tablespoon butter
3 cloves of garlic, finely minced
2 Tablespoons flour
1 cup milk (I used fat-free)
1 Tablespoon cream cheese or Neufchatel cheese
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese, plus 2 Tablespoons extra for topping
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1/8 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
Crushed red pepper flakes and fresh parsley, for optional garnish
What I did differently, aside from doubling, was that I used half parmesan - half light mozzarella shredded cheese.
Melt butter in a small pot over medium-low heat. Once hot, add garlic and sauté for 1-2 minutes. Whisk in flour, cooking for another minute while stirring. Whisk in milk until no lumps remain. Once hot, add cream cheese and stir until smooth. Remove from the heat. Stir in Parmesan, salt and pepper.
From here, I mixed my penne and spaghetti squash together in the pasta pot, then mixed the sauce in. To serve, I mixed in some bacon bits and then topped with a sprinkle of red pepper flakes and some fresh basil in lieu of parsley because honestly parsley is useless.
Result: tasty, delicious, oh em gee you can't even taste the spaghetti squash. And that's just how I like it. According to My Fitness Pal, this recipe (which serves about 4-6 people) rocks a lofty 450 calories per serving HOWEVER that was using full-fat cream cheese and full-fat parmesan. Imagine the difference using light stuff would be. I was also so incredibly full after eating it. Go fibre and vegetables.
I've been playing around with recipes for awhile, trying to make them "skinny" versions or whatever the hell the current word is for reducing the fat and not being such a pig. Yeah, skinny.
Pinterest is my best friend right now. Honestly, it is. How some of these bloggers come up with these recipes is beyond me, but I'm okay with it because my body likes the majority of it so I like the majority of it.
Below, I'm going to include some of the favourite recipes that I've used lately. Granted, there are still a lot of days where I just throw shit together and it's a "meh" meal. But these ones are great.
The above is the original recipe, which I didn't entirely follow. I mean, yes, I had all of the components. I followed the instructions for the alfredo sauce. But I added sweet, amazing, delicious... carbs.
1 spaghetti squash, cooked as you so choose*, scraped and spaghetti'd
2 cups dry PC Blue Menu Whole Wheat Penne
I cooked my squash by slicing it in half, scraping out the seeds, placing it face down on a cookie sheet with some water at 375 for about 45 minutes.
Cook your pasta as you get the sauce started. The sauce takes way longer than cooking the pasta though.
Sauce
Note:Uh, so maybe don't totally double the sauce amounts. Because I had way too much. So maybe 1.5 times it? Regardless, I doubled the below recipe and it was just way too much
1 Tablespoon butter
3 cloves of garlic, finely minced
2 Tablespoons flour
1 cup milk (I used fat-free)
1 Tablespoon cream cheese or Neufchatel cheese
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese, plus 2 Tablespoons extra for topping
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1/8 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
Crushed red pepper flakes and fresh parsley, for optional garnish
What I did differently, aside from doubling, was that I used half parmesan - half light mozzarella shredded cheese.
Melt butter in a small pot over medium-low heat. Once hot, add garlic and sauté for 1-2 minutes. Whisk in flour, cooking for another minute while stirring. Whisk in milk until no lumps remain. Once hot, add cream cheese and stir until smooth. Remove from the heat. Stir in Parmesan, salt and pepper.
From here, I mixed my penne and spaghetti squash together in the pasta pot, then mixed the sauce in. To serve, I mixed in some bacon bits and then topped with a sprinkle of red pepper flakes and some fresh basil in lieu of parsley because honestly parsley is useless.
Result: tasty, delicious, oh em gee you can't even taste the spaghetti squash. And that's just how I like it. According to My Fitness Pal, this recipe (which serves about 4-6 people) rocks a lofty 450 calories per serving HOWEVER that was using full-fat cream cheese and full-fat parmesan. Imagine the difference using light stuff would be. I was also so incredibly full after eating it. Go fibre and vegetables.
Do the Thing!
Sometimes, there's one little thing that makes you think about life differently. All the "what ifs" just seem to pile up, and every so often I find myself pulling one out and seriously pondering it.
This time, it was "What if I hadn't stopped dancing?"
I don't know who all reads this blog, so I'm just going to delve into some personal life shit right now.
Shit's about to. Get. Real.
I used to be a highland dancer. With the kilts and the swords and the bagpipes. I competed, I performed, I enjoyed it for about 11 years. I went to DisneyWorld to perform at Epcot Centre, competed across Western & Central Canada, and even went to Scotland when I was 15 to compete in about a hundred (okay, over-exaggeration) highland games and perform at Stirling Castle. I loved that part of my life, and at the time I had made some seriously amazing friends.
And then I got "too old" for it. Actually, that's false. I went away to university and ate my feelings.
Trying to get back into highland dancing is seriously tough. For one, you're constantly jumping. Some kinesiologist did the math and they determined that a 6-step fling is the equivalent of running a mile with your arms in the air and your core engaged the whole time... but this mile is run in like 3 minutes. Could you imagine? A 3-minute mile? Anyway, it's a cardiovascular gut punch.
Now try doing that after gaining 50 pounds and see how your unused leg muscles like it. Then try it again after gaining a hundred pounds, and then sit in the corner eating chocolate and chips to make yourself feel better for failure.
Nothing makes a wake-up call happen quite like not being able to do something that you did, moderately well, for eleven fucking years. It's depressing that I can't just hop up and do a 4-step fling, let alone a 6-step. Try as I might I can't even do basic moves because my muscles have apparently forgotten how to be muscles. They're just the layer between fat and bone that hangs out and says "Yeah, I'm still here, but what are you gonna do about it?"
Exercise. That's what I'm going to do about it.
My husband allowed me the purchase of a treadmill - and I say the phrase "allow" in quite the literal sense. It's a huge financial commitment AND it's just a huge commitment in general. To actually buy a piece of exercise equipment says "I'm going to fucking do this", and do this I shall. I'm starting small so as to not shock my body although going from the relative inactivity to any sort of activity routine was bound to shock it. I've been meal planning and talking with a personal trainer (who is, coincidentally, my cousin) and just trying to get things back into line so that maybe someday, even though I'm almost 30 fucking years old, I can do a fling again.
Once a highland dancer, always a highland dancer. Even if it's just at heart.
This time, it was "What if I hadn't stopped dancing?"
I don't know who all reads this blog, so I'm just going to delve into some personal life shit right now.
Shit's about to. Get. Real.
I used to be a highland dancer. With the kilts and the swords and the bagpipes. I competed, I performed, I enjoyed it for about 11 years. I went to DisneyWorld to perform at Epcot Centre, competed across Western & Central Canada, and even went to Scotland when I was 15 to compete in about a hundred (okay, over-exaggeration) highland games and perform at Stirling Castle. I loved that part of my life, and at the time I had made some seriously amazing friends.
And then I got "too old" for it. Actually, that's false. I went away to university and ate my feelings.
Trying to get back into highland dancing is seriously tough. For one, you're constantly jumping. Some kinesiologist did the math and they determined that a 6-step fling is the equivalent of running a mile with your arms in the air and your core engaged the whole time... but this mile is run in like 3 minutes. Could you imagine? A 3-minute mile? Anyway, it's a cardiovascular gut punch.
Now try doing that after gaining 50 pounds and see how your unused leg muscles like it. Then try it again after gaining a hundred pounds, and then sit in the corner eating chocolate and chips to make yourself feel better for failure.
Nothing makes a wake-up call happen quite like not being able to do something that you did, moderately well, for eleven fucking years. It's depressing that I can't just hop up and do a 4-step fling, let alone a 6-step. Try as I might I can't even do basic moves because my muscles have apparently forgotten how to be muscles. They're just the layer between fat and bone that hangs out and says "Yeah, I'm still here, but what are you gonna do about it?"
Exercise. That's what I'm going to do about it.
My husband allowed me the purchase of a treadmill - and I say the phrase "allow" in quite the literal sense. It's a huge financial commitment AND it's just a huge commitment in general. To actually buy a piece of exercise equipment says "I'm going to fucking do this", and do this I shall. I'm starting small so as to not shock my body although going from the relative inactivity to any sort of activity routine was bound to shock it. I've been meal planning and talking with a personal trainer (who is, coincidentally, my cousin) and just trying to get things back into line so that maybe someday, even though I'm almost 30 fucking years old, I can do a fling again.
Once a highland dancer, always a highland dancer. Even if it's just at heart.
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Broken
I was doing well. Really well. Eating better, getting my water in, working out every night. For the first time in at least 2 years (so, since I was pregnant with Olivia) there was a 2 at the front of my weight.
Then... it happened.
Wait, I'm making this sound a lot more dramatic than it needs to be.
Basically, I sprained my knee. I was standing on my left leg, knee bent, with my right foot resting on my left knee so as to unzip my boots to take them off. My left leg jerks back (I honestly have no idea how it happened) and that one sharp bit of pain occurred. This happened on Wednesday of last week.
By Sunday, I couldn't bend my knee or lift it up or put weight on it without crying. I actually full on burst into tears when Tyler was helping me put a pillow under my knee on the couch. Like sobbing. I've never injured my knee before, aside from that brief stint with junior arthritis when I was 15 (and the doctor gave me Vioxx and I was SUPER high at school). Roll an ankle, pfft. I'm used to that. Sprain my knee and it's apparently my Achilles heel.
Anyway, I went into the doctor on Sunday and he said I should stay home until Friday of this week, and if it's still not feeling better by then to come back to the clinic and they'll extend it.
Work is not happy. I've missed so much in the last 4 months with my illnesses and Olivia's illnesses, so this knee is just the icing on the cake. Lord I hope I still have a job.
Things have been... dull. I'm starting to get to the point where I feel dissatisfied with life again, which is not good. Last time I felt this way I dyed my hair super dark and then chopped it all off and went back to blond (which I am still trying to fix). I don't know what it is that's making me feel this way though. Probably the inactivity, or maybe because I've been at my job for a year and that is literally the longest I've been at a single employer. Depressing that I'm going to be 29 this year and the longest I've been at a job is 1 year but hey, I was/am flighty.
Today is Shrove Tuesday/Fat Tuesday/Mardi Gras/Pancake Tuesday so we'll be eating pancakes and turkey bacon for supper. I found a good whole wheat pancake recipe, so we'll see how that turns out.
I'm also trying to sort out stuff for Olivia's birthday. I still have some time, as we're not having her party until the 29th, but I don't know if you realise just how hard it is to try to sort shit out for a bunch of kids. Not even kids, toddlers. Who do we invite? Do we have games? Do these kids even care about games? Why did we have to have a kid in the winter when it's miserable outside? Uggghhh. And Tyler has said that when we decide to have another one, he wants it born in March or April again. Come on, dude. Let me have pregnancy during summer so I can embrace sandals and maxi dresses because that's all that my giant belly and fat feet will fit into.
I shall get back to my lounging. Just putting it out there, but the bag of peas I've been using as an ice pack is WAY more effective than the actual ice pack that Tyler picked up. Thanks, peas. I knew you were good for something.
Then... it happened.
Wait, I'm making this sound a lot more dramatic than it needs to be.
Basically, I sprained my knee. I was standing on my left leg, knee bent, with my right foot resting on my left knee so as to unzip my boots to take them off. My left leg jerks back (I honestly have no idea how it happened) and that one sharp bit of pain occurred. This happened on Wednesday of last week.
By Sunday, I couldn't bend my knee or lift it up or put weight on it without crying. I actually full on burst into tears when Tyler was helping me put a pillow under my knee on the couch. Like sobbing. I've never injured my knee before, aside from that brief stint with junior arthritis when I was 15 (and the doctor gave me Vioxx and I was SUPER high at school). Roll an ankle, pfft. I'm used to that. Sprain my knee and it's apparently my Achilles heel.
Anyway, I went into the doctor on Sunday and he said I should stay home until Friday of this week, and if it's still not feeling better by then to come back to the clinic and they'll extend it.
Work is not happy. I've missed so much in the last 4 months with my illnesses and Olivia's illnesses, so this knee is just the icing on the cake. Lord I hope I still have a job.
Things have been... dull. I'm starting to get to the point where I feel dissatisfied with life again, which is not good. Last time I felt this way I dyed my hair super dark and then chopped it all off and went back to blond (which I am still trying to fix). I don't know what it is that's making me feel this way though. Probably the inactivity, or maybe because I've been at my job for a year and that is literally the longest I've been at a single employer. Depressing that I'm going to be 29 this year and the longest I've been at a job is 1 year but hey, I was/am flighty.
Today is Shrove Tuesday/Fat Tuesday/Mardi Gras/Pancake Tuesday so we'll be eating pancakes and turkey bacon for supper. I found a good whole wheat pancake recipe, so we'll see how that turns out.
I'm also trying to sort out stuff for Olivia's birthday. I still have some time, as we're not having her party until the 29th, but I don't know if you realise just how hard it is to try to sort shit out for a bunch of kids. Not even kids, toddlers. Who do we invite? Do we have games? Do these kids even care about games? Why did we have to have a kid in the winter when it's miserable outside? Uggghhh. And Tyler has said that when we decide to have another one, he wants it born in March or April again. Come on, dude. Let me have pregnancy during summer so I can embrace sandals and maxi dresses because that's all that my giant belly and fat feet will fit into.
I shall get back to my lounging. Just putting it out there, but the bag of peas I've been using as an ice pack is WAY more effective than the actual ice pack that Tyler picked up. Thanks, peas. I knew you were good for something.
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