You'll always hear different tales of pregnancy. Some women get the worst of it: nausea for all 9 months, acne, bloating, hair EVERYWHERE, etc. Others just seem to float through it, developing a beautiful basketball belly and just seem to look like a perfect pregnant lady.
Watch 'What to Expect When You're Expecting' and it'll give you a pretty accurate view point of the differences.
With me, my two pregnancies have been relatively similar. Nausea during the first trimester, but where last time I was able to laze around and sleep it off this time I had a toddler and a job to be held accountable to.
With my daughter, the only issues I had were my weight (which I'll get into in a minute) and that I was glucose intolerant. That means that I didn't have gestational diabetes, but I wasn't scot free either. I tested my blood sugar like 8 times a day, and kept a food diary. But by doing that, I guaranteed that my child (and subsequently myself) was healthy. She came out, 10 days overdue, at 7 lbs 10 oz which is a perfectly average sized baby.
My weight is a different story.
When I say I only gained 30 lbs when pregnant, some people get pissed off because they gained 60+. Be all pissed off, but then realize that I started pregnancy at a whopping just-shy-of 300 lbs. Morbidly obese according to everything. I was lucky that I mostly gained weight in my belly, and in my boobs, and just a bit in my face. I swelled up a bit in the hands and feet, but nothing crazy like some of my friends who couldn't fit their shoes.
When it came time to have my daughter, I was in labour for about 20 hours with 1 hour of active pushing before they called for a c-section. By this point I was like "JUST GET HER OUT I DON'T CARE HOW". Like, I heard the OB and OB resident whispering about a c-section and I was like "Did you say c-section? Where do I sign? Let's get started".
Once in the OR, the OB and OB resident were faced with a problem. Because I have that hideous permanent fanny pack that lots of larger women have, they couldn't figure out where the best placement for the incision was. If they went under the flap, they ran the risk of infection because I wouldn't be able to see it or clean it properly/keep it dry. If they went over, they ran the risk of it just not being a nice scar or healing clean away. They chose to go on top, simply to minimize the risk of infection. I do not regret them their decision, because in the end it was the best decision.
I suffer a lot of insecurity about it now, though, almost 3 years later. Especially being pregnant again. Everything is wonky, the scar (as well as the 4 laproscopy scars from my gall bladder surgery) is so fucking obvious and just goddamn hideous. I can't hide it. If I wear leggings and not a long enough shirt, you can even see where it indents between my belly and my flap. My flap is uneven because the skin wasn't pulled up evenly when they stapled it together and that's a huge bone of self-consciousness for me.
I find myself disgusted at my own body, even more than I was before babies. And this time, it's something that I had no control of. Yes, okay, it could be argued that I had control of my body pre-babies and that I could have lost the weight and sorted it out so I wouldn't have to deal with this now... But that's hindsight. When you're lying on an operating table and you're just anxious to meet your child, you give no fucks about how they come out. You give no fucks after the baby is out because you had your child FINALLY and you are 100% absorbed with them and their needs.
It's only once you start to get over that birth that you realize that things are not going to be the same. Lots of smaller women have issues with their hips having permanently stretched, or they have some extra skin because they got so big with their child. We all have insecurities, and I fully acknowledge that mine are just added into that lump, but Christ... I feel disfigured.
Pregnancy is beautiful, and wonderful... until it's not.
