Broken

I was doing well. Really well. Eating better, getting my water in, working out every night. For the first time in at least 2 years (so, since I was pregnant with Olivia) there was a 2 at the front of my weight.

Then... it happened.

Wait, I'm making this sound a lot more dramatic than it needs to be.

Basically, I sprained my knee. I was standing on my left leg, knee bent, with my right foot resting on my left knee so as to unzip my boots to take them off. My left leg jerks back (I honestly have no idea how it happened) and that one sharp bit of pain occurred.  This happened on Wednesday of last week.

By Sunday, I couldn't bend my knee or lift it up or put weight on it without crying. I actually full on burst into tears when Tyler was helping me put a pillow under my knee on the couch. Like sobbing. I've never injured my knee before, aside from that brief stint with junior arthritis when I was 15 (and the doctor gave me Vioxx and I was SUPER high at school). Roll an ankle, pfft. I'm used to that. Sprain my knee and it's apparently my Achilles heel.

Anyway, I went into the doctor on Sunday and he said I should stay home until Friday of this week, and if it's still not feeling better by then to come back to the clinic and they'll extend it.

Work is not happy. I've missed so much in the last 4 months with my illnesses and Olivia's illnesses, so this knee is just the icing on the cake. Lord I hope I still have a job.

Things have been... dull.  I'm starting to get to the point where I feel dissatisfied with life again, which is not good. Last time I felt this way I dyed my hair super dark and then chopped it all off and went back to blond (which I am still trying to fix).  I don't know what it is that's making me feel this way though. Probably the inactivity, or maybe because I've  been at my job for a year and that is literally the longest I've been at a single employer. Depressing that I'm going to be 29 this year and the longest I've been at a job is 1 year but hey, I was/am flighty.

Today is Shrove Tuesday/Fat Tuesday/Mardi Gras/Pancake Tuesday so we'll be eating pancakes and turkey bacon for supper. I found a good whole wheat pancake recipe, so we'll see how that turns out.

I'm also trying to sort out stuff for Olivia's birthday. I still have some time, as we're not having her party until the 29th, but I don't know if you realise just how hard it is to try to sort shit out for a bunch of kids. Not even kids, toddlers. Who do we invite? Do we have games? Do these kids even care about games? Why did we have to have a kid in the winter when it's miserable outside? Uggghhh. And Tyler has said that when we decide to have another one, he wants it born in March or April again. Come on, dude. Let me have pregnancy during summer so I can embrace sandals and maxi dresses because that's all that my giant belly and fat feet will fit into.

I shall get back to my lounging. Just putting it out there, but the bag of peas I've been using as an ice pack is WAY more effective than the actual ice pack that Tyler picked up. Thanks, peas. I knew you were good for something.